The Sun on My Face And the List in My Mind (Gabrielle)
I spent part of today feeling like I should feel like I was going insane. But I didn’t. I felt right.
A little history. Today I got up, made breakfast and then a list of what I wanted to do today. This list looked something like “Clean the Kitchen; clean the bathrooms; wash breakfast dishes; sewing.” But then Arianna looked out the window and noticed what a nice day it was. She looked at me with those big, brown eyes and said, “Could we go to the park today? Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease?” To buy some time I hedged and said maybe. Then I looked at my list and told myself of course I could not take them to the park; I had a list. But then I remembered nothing specific about everything I knw about life. It wasn’t even I remembered my mother telling me about how sometimes you need to forget the list. It was just this knowledge that right now I needed to go to the park with the kids and if I didn’t I was cheapening my life and theirs.
And then I asked myself what would make this trip to the park full of happiness for the kids. And naturally I thought of the Lansberrys. What is a lovely day and a trip to the park without a friend to share it with? So I called and Raquel and I planned a picnic at the park. Theresa would get a nap and Crystal, who wasn’t feeling well, could rest and we would have fun. Then I wondered who else might enjoy this picnic at the park. So I called Jon, a friend of ours who has been adopted into our Ben-Ezra-Lansberry clan, and asked if he wanted to come and hang out at the park with Raquel and I and nine kids. He said that it sounded like fun and I didn’t disabuse him of this pleasant idea. He came, Raquel and those chillens came and me and these chillens all piled out and headed to the park.
It was a wonderful time. The sky was blue and the sun was warm. The wind was blowing, but it was warm. It did enjoy playing with my clothing more than I liked, but I still liked the wind. We threw rocks into water and Jon pushed the kids on a tire swing. They got to see a catfish in the pond and Samuel Lansberry found three or four beads on the walk home.
When we finally got home I was tired. Everybody left and the kids sat down to watch their Friday movie. I did some sewing and went to look at my list. And I thought about what I had done today instead of all those things. And I felt good. I felt like I had done right. And I’m sitting here feeling very tired and the kitchen won’t get cleaned until Monday, but when Noah came down from his nap he had little strip on his face where he got a little burnt by the sun. And it was good and it was right and I was glad.